The Office: The Michael Scott Paper Company

Filed under: Recaps & Reviews

This episode is much funnier than the last one. Maybe that's why they had to have two in one night.

Michael screeches up in the street outside the business park, blaring Lady Gaga. As he pulls up to the camera, he turns down the music and tells us, "It's Britney, bitch. And I am back." He attempts a parallel park in a spot big enough for two cars, fails and hits the back car, gives up and heads in to the parking lot, pulling into the narrowest spot known to mankind. Michael proclaims, "They can take away my parking spot, but they can't take away my pride!" as he climbs over the back of his convertible.

Jim and Pam pull up as blond Ryan walks into the building. Jim: "LOVE the hair." Ryan ignores him.

"New credits" play as we watch the Michael Scotters in their new office, with their copier marked "Trash" (presumably the old one from upstairs), and John Krasinski's name emblazoned over a shot of a picture of him on Pam's "desk," which is really just a discarded poker table.

Upstairs at Dunder Mifflin, Kelly's still trying to capture Charles's attention. Her new plan is based on the fact that the new receptionist, a cute little brunette, is also named Kelly, so every time Charles calls for Kelly, Kelly Kapoor bounces into his office with a "Yes, Charles, you wanted me?" Jim tells us that she thinks if she says this enough times, he'll eventually want her for real. Instead, he decides to call Kelly "Kapoor," and the new receptionist elects to go by her middle name, Erin.

Downstairs at Michael Scott, they have sewage pipes running through their office, so every time someone flushes upstairs, they get a nice waterfall effect. Michael tells us about all the preparation he's done for this day, including evites for pancake luncheon, for which they have had six affirmative RSVPs, one maybe, and only 11 nos. And 782 of the 788 remaining invitees have viewed the invitation!

Michael tries to get Pam to make copies of coupons for "unparalleled customer service" for the luncheon, but she thinks she should refuse, because if she makes one copy, she'll have to make all the copies. The sad thing is that she really likes making copies, she tells us. They're all warm and stuff. I get it, Pam. I get it.

Dwight and Andy are apparently hunting buddies now. Dwight interviews that their animosity has blossomed into a beautiful friendship.

Ryan's on his cell phone talking to one of his friends, and he tells him that someone "would probably be a six in New York, but she's like a seven here," and then we (and Pam) realize he's talking about Pam. Nice.

In what my digital cable provider thinks is this week's most important storyline, Charles asks Jim for "a rundown of his clients." Jim has no idea what the hell he means, but because he is totally terrified of the man, instead of asking for a detailed explanation like a normal person would, he just kind of leans into Charles' office to ask when he needs it by, exactly? Charles tells him ASAP, just get it right. Jim is being so very awkward.

Erin's in the kitchen getting ice, and Dwight uses this opportunity to flirt with her by creeping her out with a ghost story about some prostitute who was murdered when the building used to be a brothel in the 1800s. Mm-hmm. Somehow, she totally buys this, and nearly jumps out of her skin when he reaches around behind her shoulders and taps her. She heads out just as Andy heads in, and they do that awkward dance where you can't get by the other person, and then they turn it into an actual dance, and it seems she is just as big of a dork as he is.

Down in the dungeon, there is a lot of bickering going on. It's pointless to even recap what Ryan and Pam are fighting about, because it's basically anything they can find. Also, you can hear people in the bathroom right above them through the vent, specifically in this instance, Toby talking on his cell phone about Damages and whether tan and blue go together. Also also, the whiteboard behind Michael says:

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. – Wayne Gretzky" – Michael Scott


Michael whines on the phone to his mom that "R" doesn't want to be here and "P" is no fun without Jim. R and P continue to bicker. Michael calls an impromptu meeting and tells them he thinks the cause is that the space is too small. He says that they are each to pick a corner of the room as their personal space, a retreat, if you will. Pam suggests that maybe they could work from home, while Ryan thinks Michael should fire one of them--the one with less education. But Michael's sold on the corner thing. He hollers, "One, two, three, what are we gonna do?" and Pam's like, "...Corner idea?" Michael says they were supposed to say, "Rock the house!" Pam: "Let me know that!" Ryan: "Rock the house!"

Dwight discusses with Andy that he clearly likes the new girl, but so does Dwight, so where does that leave them? They each attempt to concede her to the other. This is so weird.

Jim asks Oscar if he knows anything about this rundown, but he's also at sea. He wonders why Jim has waited hours to try and figure this out. It's because he just doesn't what to do. Oh, Jim.

Pam's so annoyed with Ryan's inane cell phone chatter that she seeks solace in her corner. The toilet flushes above her, and Michael says it's his corner. She thought the one over by his desk was, but he says that's where he works and he can't relax where he works. So she is stuck in the copier corner, great.

Charles keeps asking Jim if he's done with the rundown, but Jim is super awkward again, some more. He wonders if Charles has one he can look at? Charles it just like, Get it done.

Pam comes up to see Charles and cuts right to the chase: she wants her job back. He's sorry, but the position has been filled, and he doesn't bite at her suggestions that she could come back as a salesperson (with experience now!), personal assistant or perhaps... personal shopper?

She sits in the Dunder Mifflin interview space and says she's just going to stay a little longer, if that's ok. It smells good and the chairs are comfortable.

Stanley and Phyllis stop down in the dungeon to say hi. Michael offers a tour, but they can pretty much see all of it from the door. Stanley laughs at Ryan/Ryan's hair, and tells Michael that Pam's upstairs talking to Charles.

Michael, out in the hallway, is feeing distraught. He says maybe this was a mistake and he should leave and start his own paper company, because that would show 'em!

Later, at the pancake luncheon in the parking lot, Michael is making giant, square pancakes for no one. Pam shows up, and Michael asks where she's been. She tells him she was taking care of some things, and that's as specific as she's like to be. He guilt-trips her with, "At least you're still being honest with me."

Jim brings his pseudo-maybe-rundown in to Charles and tells him he may have expanded some areas he didn't need to. Charles just tells him to fax it to his distribution list. And that would be... which distribution list, exactly? Jim says he'll just use the one he has. So awkward. He just faxes it to his dad.


Pam, at the pancake luncheon, has found a potential client--perhaps some random passerby? She tells him they're small but eager to make a name for ourselves, and no, she doesn't have a car, but she does have a scrap of paper!

Meredith and Creed have come out for the free pancakes, but Creed declares them terrible--they have to be in circles so they cook evenly!--and pulls a stack of six or so out of his coat and says he doesn't even want them. Meredith takes them for her kid.

Dwight and Andy are having a jam session in the break room, with Dwight on guitar and Andy on Banjo. Dwight strums "Take Me Home, Country Roads," and Erin comes in to get a snack and starts singing along. She declares that she loves that song, and that Dwight is really good. Dwight: "YOU'RE good." Andy and Dwight start one-upping each other back and forth, and it is truly epic. I don't want to make you feel bad if you missed it, but I like snort-laughed my way through this scene. That's right: not just laughed. Snort-laughed. They get rather spirited with their rendition until Toby finally knocks on the window from the annex and tells them, "You have to stop!"

The phone rings back in the dungeon, and Michael makes Pam answer it (she starts answering it "Dunder Mifflin," but corrects about a syllable in. "Michael Scott Paper Company, this is Pam" just doesn't have the same ring, though). It's Russell from the pancake luncheon and he wants to do business with them. Michael frantically whisper-yells for her to offer him free delivery and scrambles for the pricing list. She waves Ryan and Michael away, provides Russell with a guarantee of satisfaction, and closes the sale. There is dancing. Lame, lame dancing. Also jumping up and down (on Pam's part).

The Michael Scotters leave the office, their day complete, high on life. Ryan's mom picks him up, Pam meets Jim in the parking lot with a kiss, and Michael climbs back over the end of his car. Meanwhile, an interview with Michael at his new desk plays, and he tells us all about his team's big hearts and what have you, and says they've done very well with their 165 square feet. A toilet flushes above his head.

Tags: the office, the office u.s., michael scott, dunder mifflin

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