Filed under: Recaps & Reviews
Well, it's all up to you now, America. Don't screw the pooch.
Oh no, I'm actually squealing "jidges" along with the audience now. This show, it has overtaken my brain.
Top 10 Performances
So everyone's in new couples, and we're not getting any rehearsal footage because there are two routines for each couple plus solos to get through, so... Oy, twenty dances?? Are you kidding me?
Sigh. On with the dancing!
Noelle has been paired with Ryan for an office-themed Tabitha & Napoleon hip-hop routine set to "Give It to Me Right" by Melanie Fiona. Noelle's buttoned-up office outfit (still including shorty-making pants and shoes) is covering up a sexy black bustier. I can't tell if she's good or not because I'm too distracted by how good at hip-hop Ryan is not. Let's throw it to the judges, shall we?
(But not before we comment on how right at the end she threw Sexual Harassment papers at him, which he then tossed over his shoulder. That gets more than one "Bwah?" from me.)
Nigel says Noelle was sexy and Ryan was strong but not funky enough, but the two of them were fun together. Mary says "expecially" right off the bat, so I sort of missed the rest of it what with the bleeding in my ears. Adam thought Noelle really abandoned herself to the dance and she needs to continue to do that. Ryan, he says, didn't have his high point of the show, but turned in another solid performance.
Ashleigh & Legacy are doing a contemporary routine by a choreographer possibly named Gary Stewart (I hate this no rehearsal footage thing! Also it means more typing on my part because there is more dancing and less fastforwarding!), and the song is "Poison" by The Prodigy. And who doesn't love The Prodigy. You know what else I like, sarcastically speaking? This routine. It's bad. It's all like mixed martial arts and slow transitions, and poor Ashleigh & Legacy commit to it the best they can, but... no.
Nigel talks about this new choreographer PASHA IS SITTING BEHIND HIM IN THE AUDIENCE OMG HIIIIIIIII PASHA and says he asks his dancers to defy gravity and it's almost impossible to learn in three days. Nigel thinks their effort was fantastic. Mary liked the visual of the headstand Legacy ended with (ok, me too) and thinks they fought it out right to the finish. Adam found it compelling that they looked fearless up there, even in the face of such difficult choreography.
Ooh, some filler! A profile on Mollee! Blah blah blah, we are reminded Mollee's mom's name is Thursday. And then her solo, to "Rock the Beat" by LMFAO, which, I kid you not, they have changed to LM*AO. What, we can't even abbreviate the f-word now? Seriously. Her solo is acrobatic and technical and young and fun, and I'll tell you the truth: I am intimidated by her flat stomach.
And now, Russell's profile. His parents are awesome and very, very proud. He solos to "Outros" by Black Milk and it's amazing. You're shocked, I know. I am stoked that we now get to watch him solo all the time. Provided he stays around, which... well, I haven't seen the results show yet. Russell is adorbs as Cat reads his numbers (02! Vote for him! Retroactively!), and then he, I don't know, sideways moonwalks (I'm sure there's a real hip-hop name for it) off the stage, to make way for...
...Kathryn & Nathan, who've got a Spencer Liff Broadway routine to "Choreography" by Danny Kaye from White Christmas. Oh my word, they're so good. I feel like I'm watching actual Broadway. Spencer Liff, you delight me. Kathryn, you delight me. Sans-Mollee Nathan, you delight me. (This is me applauding on my piano bench, from whence I type this.)
Nigel thought they embodied the style perfectly, but their chemistry wasn't as good as it could have been. Mary loves Kathryn and her ability to adapt; she also thought Nathan did super well with it. Adam gets historical about cinematic dancing, and he loved the routine and he loves Spencer. I think he might looooove Spencer. I don't know why Nathan looks like he might cry.
Time for Noelle's profile. She has a big family, and was also in Vegas during Season 5 and had to play a lot of catch-up to get her high school diploma because of it. Her solo is to "Every Time It Rains" by Charlotte Martin, and it's pretty typical contemporary, but she's passionate about it so it's fun to watch. Also her hair looks abnormally good.
Ellenore is dancing with Jakob, which, yay!, and not so yay, they're doing a Tony & Melanie Dreaded Quickstep to Manhattan Transfer and "Four Brothers." Come on, Favourites! Be awesome! There is a giant trophy at the back of the stage and the screen behind them bears the words "Quickstep Dance Competition." From what I can tell, Jakob is near perfect, and Ellenore drops her frame quite a bit but otherwise is very elegant. They run back to grab the trophy at the end, and a banner drops down to reveal "CHAMPIONS." Nice touch.
Nigel liked quite a few things about it, including the timesteps because they hearken back to the lost tappers of days gone by (they were always my favourite thing in tap, too) and comments that Jakob's feet were turned out and his elbows dropped sometimes. Wait a sec -- HER elbows dropped more than his. Whatever. Mary says Tony & Melanie gave them some really tough stuff, which shows they had a lot of confidence in the dancers, and they did it very well. Adam thought they were fantastic but it takes a really long time for us to learn this from all the words he's saying.
Ryan and his profile. Dancing is in his blood. Um, his solo is to "Rock You Like a Hurricane" by the Scorpions, which is hilarious to me for inside-joke reasons that it would bore you for me to reveal here. It's pretty good as far as rocker-style ballroom-guy solos go, though.
Kathryn and her profile. Dancing is also in her blood. Not too long ago, she moved to Los Angeles from much further east, all by herself. She is my kind of girl. Her mom is adorable and proud. She dances to "Beautiful" by Bethany Dillon, which reveals her to be even more my kind of girl. She is like me only a much better dancer and a much bigger crier. Her contemporary is just as contemporary as Noelle's, but possibly even more passionate, or maybe that's merely my perception because I love Kathryn so.
The last couple to dance first is Mollee & Russell, doing a Mandy Moore jazz dance, so you know it's going to be 80s-themed. Yes! "It Must Have Been Love," Roxette. Amazing. Well, the routine itself is kind of boring, but no matter, let's hear from the judges.
Nigel loved the choreography, loves Mollee's growth now that she's apart from Nathan, and is very proud of Russell. Nigel. The guy is not untrained. "I mean, seriously." Quit patronizing him. Mary pauses so long you know there's a scream coming. She loves their chemistry and shrieks a lot. I'm confused; what routine were the judges watching? Because I almost fell asleep from ennui. Adam asks Russell and Mollee to please not dance so well in the future so that Mary will scream less. Adam loves Russell and his chameleonhood, which I think we can all get on board with. Adam likes Mollee so much more without Nathan. Everybody hates Nathan so much, you guys.
Speak of the devil, here's Nathan's profile clip. He has brothers who dance and inspired him to dance. He cries or fake-cries, your call. His solo is to "Golden Train" to Justin Nozuka, and there is spinning (BLESS). He's teary. Because he's taking Adam's advice, see.
Noelle & Ryan's second dance is a JT & Tomas smooth waltz to "Jeux d'eau" from Cirque du Soleil. It's very lovely, and to my eye, well danced and well emoted. Maybe the best smooth waltz we've seen on this show, both choreography- and dance-wise.
Nigel thought it was beautiful (HI HOT!TOMAS) but wishes for more softness in Noelle's neck and shoulders. Mary, however, thought Noelle was elegant and breathtaking, and that she gained strength from Ryan, who also gets quite a large number of kudos. I love when Mary is coherent. Adam was hypnotized by the performance to the point where he found himself breathing with them. He calls out a specific perfect moment that I noticed as well, only he uses much dancier words to describe it than I would have.
Well, I was going to take a break here and finish this later, but Ellenore's profile is up next, so I can't walk away now. Her parents picked up and moved to NYC from California just so she could train and dance. That's commitment. Her solo is to "Beatbox Harmonica" by Yuri Lane, and I love it (and her) so. She's like this awesome girl version of Mark from two seasons ago, and the person I most want to be best friends with on this show. Probably ever of any season. I like quirky people, I guess. She is just my FAVOURITE. If she has gone home, I will cry. (Still unspoiled for the results!)
Oh heck, what's one more. Ashleigh & Legacy are back with a Dave Scott hip-hop routine to "Slow Down" by Bobby Valentino. It appears to be vampire-themed. It's Dave Scott's typical brand of accessible hip-hop, which I generally like, so I'm pretty down with it but I wouldn't put it among my faves of the night. I think these two might both be suffering without their previous partners. Let's see if the judges agree...
Nigel didn't feel it. The audience boos. It didn't work for Mary either. Adam says it wasn't challenging enough for this point in the competition. Uh-oh, Dave Scott's in troubs.
Here with a rumba from Tony & Melanie, it's Kathryn & Nathan. Oh boy, we get to watch Nathan attempt sexy. The song is "Walk On By" by Aretha Franklin. Kathryn is really throwing herself into this, lackluster babyface partner or no. To be fair, he is making a solid go of it and I commend his effort at Serious Face. (He's been practicing all night.)
Nigel doesn't appear to have liked it -- choreography, chemistry and all. He's so mean to Tony & Melanie this season. Mary says it lacked passion. Ok, but seriously, Kathryn tried. There's only so much you can do on your own chemistry-wise. She does call out a couple of really amazing Kathryn moments, though. Adam loved Kathryn and... I don't know how he feels about Nathan, but he says a lot of words to him.
Legacy, with his profile and his solo. He started b-boying in his teens and a few years ago moved to L.A. to Miami to dance. He and his buddy "Flea" made rent dancing on the Santa Monica Promenade. BEEN THERE. (This makes me special, you know.) His tricky solo is to "No Air" by Jordin Sparks & Chris Brown, so we get the slo-mo breaking, which to me seems like it would be even harder. Cat says the choreographers are all on their feet cheering for him. I don't know, I can't see them. Legacy's dad busts a move in the audience. I love him and his yellow sweater.
Ellenore & Jakob are back with a contemporary piece from Sonya Tayeh to "Tore My Heart" by OONA & Dave Tweedie, which is the song that weird, awesome girl Kelsea danced to in the audition rounds. (I think Sonya was there for that.) One presumes it will be awesome. One would be right. I mean, could anyone give Sonya two more perfect dancers for her to mold her choreography into and around? No. Oh, it's so weird and perfect. I have such love for these two (three, if you count Sonya). CHILLS. (Cat agrees, but I said it first. At least in my house.)
Nigel does a Mary scream, it was THAT GOOD. They rewrote the rules of chemistry, they're the best ever, they set the bar, they're in a class of their own, they're brilliant brilliant brilliant, etc. Mary and Adam concur. Lordy, Mary is one annoying lady. I mean, in case you hadn't noticed. Adam thinks it was a particularly big moment for the show. And then the judges give them a standing ovation and they do that... thing... where they roll their arms around and wooooooooo a lot.
Ashleigh. She grew up dancing and then had a parasitic infection that immobilized her for years. That's intense. Good on her for overcoming it. Her solo is to everybody's favourite Bob Azzam song, "Batucada Por Favor." It's shimmery and shakey and, you know, Ashleigh-like.
YOU GUYS. PASHA & ANYA CHOREOGRAPHED THE NEXT ONE. It's a jive! Sadly, it will be danced by Mollee & Russell. Sigh. And even sadder? NO REHEARSAL FOOTAGE. Oh beloved Pasha, come back to me. So the song is the crowd-pleasing "Land of 1000 Dances" by Jimmy Barnes, and the routine is so Anya there aren't even words. I miss that lady, too. It's fun to watch and there are some cool tricks, and they don't look too scared by it... but I'll wait for Mary to weigh in before I get too excited.
Nigel commends them for a solid performance following such an amazing dance as went before them. (He means Ellenore & Jakob, not Ashleigh.) Mary wooooooooos for Pasha & Anya, hot tamales that they truly are. (Gah, Pasha, I just wanna.... eat him up with a spoon. He's so damn cute I'm just at a loss.) She woohoos for Mollee & Russell too, so I guess I was right: it was fun and they brought it to life. Now shut up, Mary.
Lastly, finally, it's Jakob. He grew up where Tiger Woods's wife beat him with a golf club and then he drove his SUV into a tree. Have you heard about that? HAHAHA, I'm hilarious, of course you have. Jakob has a very supportive mother. She seems lovely. He's dancing to "Always Midnight" by Pat Monahan, and he is, of course, fantaburific. He does not seem like a very tall boy, and yet his lines are the longest lines I think I have maybe ever seen. And he's BFFs with the awesome Jeanine! What's not to love about this adorable man?
I'm not recapping the recap for you. But I will say that I think the bottom four dancers will be Noelle, Ashleigh, Nathan and Ryan... whether deserved or not.
Top 10 Results
All right, let's learn the fate of our Top 10. Cat is looking pretty spicy in red-red lipstick and bedroom hair, so I'd say she's ready to go.
The group dance is all leather and rock and roll and shaggy hair and back alley sets and Billy Joel, and I'm guessing... Mandy Moore? Aaaand I'm wrong, it was Tyce. Argh, I suck at this game; I gotta go with my first instinct more often. At any rate, I didn't care for the routine.
We get a recap of last night, another Dominic segment with audience members, and then the Top 5 girls line up, still in costume, to learn their fates.
Ellinore is safe. (Eeeeeeeee!)
Mollee's safe and totally shocked.
Noelle is in the bottom two.
Down to Ashleigh and Kathryn, and the second member of the bottom two is... Kathryn. Oh, damn. Well, I was half right.
And now, the boys, also in costume.
Ryan is in the bottom two. Ashleigh is sad for him.
Cat is adorable telling Russell that he's safe.
Jakob... is safe. That one I could type in full confidence before it happened.
Now it's between Nathan and Legacy. The guy in the bottom two is... Nathan.
3 for 4! I am awesome at this game!
The special guest dancers tonight are the Legion of Extraordinary Dancers. I heard via Facebook last night that they were amazing, and they don't disappoint. It's like... hip-hop to a string quartet version of Coldplay's "Yellow," and every single guy and girl in the crew is, well, extraordinary. HEY IS THAT LIL C? I THINK IT IS.
You guys. They are so unbelievable. I'm sitting here with my jaw on the floor and I just don't have words. There is all this INCREDIBLE synchronized flipping, and at one point one guy like, conducts a bunch of the other dancers as though they're musical instruments, and even the guy who does the robot at the end is like the MOST INSANE ROBOTER EVER. It is physics-defying, all of it.
We get a nice slow pan across the dancers as the audience applauds them, and I see a few familiar faces... Jamile from Season 1, C, people I recognize but can't name... and apparently Legacy is a member of this particular Legion as well. He don't need this show!
Back to boring old normal SYTYCD dancers and their solos... Noelle's up first, with her contemporary routine from last night (I hate when they make them repeat the same solo! What's the point?). She's got bruises all over her legs, ouchie. Cat asks Adam to say something nice to Noelle, so he obliges. He would love to give her a job in the future.
We get Ryan's solo again, and then Cat purrs at him (literally), and Mary lies that he's one of the best ballroom dancers they've ever had on this show. Hellooooooooooo, Pasha? Dmitry? Anya? Chelsie? Benji? Heidi? You shut your mouth, Mary Murphy. Repeatedly, please.
Then Kathryn. I think she's wearing the same outfit as last night, but I can't be bothered to check for real. She gets Mary as well, who compliments her heavily and deservedly. Cat asks her what it's like to be in the bottom for the first time, and Kathryn says that if you're in the bottom, it's because someone needs to see you solo to get you and vote for you (I paraphrase), and she's so wise and delightful and she doesn't even squeak this time when she gets weepy and I just love her.
Nathan solos, still sad. Why so glum, chum? (Oh wow, I am in fact turning into my mother before your very eyes.) Nigel compliments him and he thinks Nathan's now on a good path and should continue on it if he stays tonight. Tough love, blah blah blah. He rightly points out that this is not a competition where people are voted off, but rather where other people get more votes than someone, and with a group as diverse and talented as they have this season, he should be proud no matter what happens. Nathan smiles and says something positive, finally.
Snoop Dogg. Whatever. Hok and Dom and Ryan and their crew are performing with him, so I guess I'll watch it. Or half of it.
Ok, actual for-real results now. Of the girls, Noelle is going home. Phewf. I mean, I like her, but I like Kathryn more.
Cue sad Fray song. :(
Boys. Nathan goes.
Well, I'm glad that was as predictable as it was. I'd like to see Ashleigh and Ryan go next week; how about you? Wouldn't that be a fitting end to their husband/wife story? (Don't get me wrong, I don't mind them; I just like the others better.)
Also, leave me your LXD links in the comments. I want to watch them all day long!
Russell and Mollee did a good job with the jive, but the whole time I was watching, I was wishing that we could see Anya and Pasha dance it. *sigh*