Bones: The Princess and the Pear

Filed under: Recaps & Reviews

This recap is late – my apologies! I've been in "moving mode" for the past week, and will be this week as well. Bear with me! This episode focuses on a female victim found in a sewer, wearing "Lord of the Rings porno" stuff. She was a booth babe at the Magicon.

Booth's back is out (no thanks to Brennan's "helping"), so Brennan is working with Agent Parada on this case. Mr. Fischer (or "Mr. Happy", as I called him once) is our Grad Student of the Week, and it is helpful because he's into the fantasy, sci-fi, geek stuff.

Everyone at the Magicon was after a sword that the victim had, the prop Excalibur used in a movie – worth a whole bunch apparently. She was going to auction it off, because she was low on cash. However, where she got the sword in the first place was an issue – she told people she got it from family, but some people think she stole it.

The damage to her face is unlike anything Brennan has ever seen before. Mr. Happy is frustrated because he has no idea what caused it, but Brennan eases his mind because the fact that she's never seen damage like this eliminates every weapon she's ever seen before. This makes Mr. Happy... happier.

The victim's apartment was trashed, someone tried to find the sword. Agent Parada finds an answering machine, and Hodgins finds some running shoes with trace evidence on them. The shoes show that the victim stepped on an American Toad while burying something. The habitat of the toad is a relatively small area, so that narrows the playing field a bit in finding the sword. Sweets helps analyze the voice left on the answering machine – a woman who threatened the victim for the sword.

The auctioneer gave the victim's name and address to a goth-babe who collects medieval weapons, for "pre-bidding". She is the threatening voice on the answering machine, and in an interview she gives a good alibi for the murder. She says that the victim told her that she got the sword from a "black knight".

Hodgins and Angela find the sword with a metal detector in the "toad habitat". Hodgins holds up the sword and fails at trying to be all manly with it. It isn't the murder weapon, and so the team decides to try to lure the murderer out by fake-auctioning the sword at the Magicon. Sweets will be the "high bidder" who outbids anyone else, and Mr. Happy will be discreetly videotaping any potential suspects.

At the rigged auction, we see the goth-chick, who is quickly out-bid. There is a black knight there too, but he isn't bidding. Sweets (dressed as a Red Shirt trekkie) is bidding against a snooty English guy. Sweets finally bids $500,000 for the sword, too high for everyone else. Goth-chick hits on Mr. Happy, and Agent Parada chats with the English guy. He is part of a Camelot buyer group, and threatens to sue everyone because of the fixed auction. Dead end.

Brennan and Sweets are driving back, when they are run off the road by the Black Knight. The car tumbles down a hill and the Knight runs after them, breaks a window and tries to steal the sword. Brennan is unhurt, and gets out to kick his... well, she takes the sword back quite impressively. The Black Knight gets away, and Brennan checks on Sweets who is shaken up, but also fine.

Parada talks to Booth, who is very high on Vicodin. He talks about Brennan's silky black hair, and is quite funny. He's very protective of Brennan, and asks Parada to "take care of her".

Hodgins finds paint from the specific car that hit Brennan and Sweets. They remember the Knight "jangling". He wasn't wearing armor, because his movement wasn't constricted. They find pieces of chain mail at the crash site. He also used correct and historic attack moves, so they know that their attacker was well trained in archaic martial arts.

Mr. Happy knows what killed the victim. He slept with goth-chick, and she had a "Pear of Anguish". It's a weird "spreader" kind of thing that can be used in various orifices, including the mouth – like on our victim.

Kroon the Blacksmith – who was interviewed early on, he was the one who told us that the sword was worth so much – is being interviewed again. He is a Yale medieval historian, his arm is hurt, and his car is the same one that hit Sweets' car. He is the Black Knight, and he loved the victim. He gave her the sword as a gift, and she was going to sell it. He killed her because he loved her so much. Case closed.

Booth's doctor misdiagnosed him, and Brennan offers to fix the slight misalignment. She "fixes it", and is in an awkward position just as Parada comes in. Both women leave awkwardly, and Booth stands there, afraid to move. Tune in next week to see if Brennan fixed Booth's back, or made it worse – and to see if Booth is still on Vicodin, because he's quite funny on Vicodin!

Tags: Bones, Emily Deschanel, David Boreanaz

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