The Amazing Race: Sorry, Guys, I'm Not Happy To See You

Filed under: Recaps & Reviews

So, my computer is broken. Well, the power cord is. My roommate has been kind enough to lend me the use of hers while I wait for my new power cord to arrive, since she is never home anyway, but hers is not equipped with a PVR like mine is, which means I cannot pause or rewind this episode, which means this is coming to you real-time, stream-of-consciousness. What's that you say? "VCR"? Pshaw, says I. How archaic.

But yes, this is not about me, this is about this show that is in its second last week. Here's to hoping I have a power cord by next week. Right, NOT ABOUT ME. Moving on, we're staying in Osaka, at least for the first task, which is to find some building "with a hole in it." It's actually got some kind of floating garden on top of it, and, well... a giant gaping hole. That's some interesting architecture right there.Right away, teams are bunching up and the building doesn't open until TK & Rachel are ripping their clue, putting them much less than three full hours behind everyone else.

The other three teams are bunched up and as soon as they're able, race to the top of the building and pull a clue directing them to Taipei, Taiwan, where they are to find a specific train station. Nate says they know nothing about Taiwan except that they "think Thai food is pretty good." Oh... my. *headdesk*

As the rest of the teams head to the airport and start wrangling for tickets, TK & Rachel walk RIGHT BY the clue without seeing it. You gotta love those moments. At the airport, Christina asks her ticket girl to tell everyone else the flight they're all trying to get on is full, and she does. My mind, it is blown. Shockingly (in that it is not shocking), this makes Nate & Jenn fight with each other, not with Christina. TK & Rachel finally find their clue.

Ron & Christina get on a 1:00 (I think?) flight to Taipei, while Nate & Jenn and Nic & Gramps get on a second flight leaving not much later. These teams all land in Taiwan within half an hour or so of each other. Oh, and somehow, here are TK & Rachel also in the Taipei airport at the same time as everyone else, though as far as I can tell, they never showed us any of their flight-booking escapades. Only Ron & Christina aren't in sight, and I think that's because they didn't stop to exchange money at the airport first.

The clue Ron & Christina pull directs themto take high-speed rail and taxis to some place called Acrobatic Jeeps near Jiji. Oh, THIS is gonna be good. All three of the other teams get on the same train after Ron & Christina's leaves without them. The Roadblock clue at the Jeep place asks who's ready to go on a tricky ride. The Roadblocker has to ride along on a couple of sweet stunts, one of which involves rocking back and forth 25 feet in the air several times, and the other of which involves being driven underwater for 17 seconds. Phil says if they're still alive when they come out, they'll get their next clue. Thanks for the doom-saying, Phil.

Well, Ron survives, though he's a little damp, to say the least. The clue tells them to take high-speed rail back to Taipei and find a certain teahouse, where they are to drink a cup of tea, at the bottom of which is written their next clue. Back at the Roadblock, Rachel, Nate & Gramps will be Roadblocking. Rachel LOVES it. Nate LOVES it. TK & Jenn are jealous. TK & Rachel are sent to their Speed Bump at this point, for which they are to travel about a mile away, put on safety suits and run through fireworks that are being aimed at them. Uh, yikes.

My mom just called and I had to ignore it because I can't pause this frigging thing. That's lovely. I hope she doesn't feel unloved.

Nate just pronounced Taipei like "Ta-PIE." Good one.

TK & Rachel give 'er through the fireworks and voiceover about how crazy it was. Nonetheless, they accomplish the task with reasonably little brou-ha-ha (I have no idea how to actually spell that) and make their way to the train station, hoping to get on the same train as at least one other team. Ron & Christina are long gone, of course. Nate & Jenn and Nic & Gramps are desperately trying to get on an earlier train, but the computer system can't sell tickets on it as the departure time is too soon (and do I have to tell you that Nic gives up the fight much more easily and pleasantly than Jenn does?). I think it's the same one Ron & Christina got on, but... I'm not sure. At any rate, the three trailing teams all get on the same train. I am so, so proud of TK & Rachel for negating their three-hour deficit AND their Speed Bump. Aw, the adorable hippies are victorious once again!

On the train, Jenn whines about how they work so hard and TK & Rachel just slack off and yet they're at the same level. Okay, "not fighting" does not equal "not trying," JENN. TK reiterates my sentiments to Nic & Gramps.

Ron & Christina order tea at the teahouse. I am not getting along very well with this computer. The other teams are in cabs on their way to the teahouse. It's Jenn's birthday, by the way. She really wants you to know that. The clue Ron & Christina find at the bottom of their cups, which is in Chinese, or possibly Taiwanese, tells them to go to a certain nightmarket (Is that one word? It's one word where I come from), where they are to find a clown. They find him. The Detour is a choice between Fire and Earth. In Fire, they have to take part in a Chinese ritual and release 20 lanterns into the sky. In Earth, they walk 220 feet down a path of jagged stones. I'm... not really following what the difficult choice is supposed to be here, because lanterns sound infinitely easier than jagged stones. Maybe Fire is really far, though, because Ron & Christina choose Earth with little to no discussion. Ron has no trouble with the stones; Christina finds it slightly more painful, but she's laughing her way through it. They pull the clue sending them to the Pit Stop, Chiang Kai-Shek Plaza.

Nic & Gramps are also doing Earth, so I think I definitely must have missed something about the Fire option. My sister, after the fact, informs me they would have had to write some sort of message on each of the lanterns before releasing them and it would have thusly taken way longer. Ah, well then. TK & Rachel choose Earth, as do Nate & Jenn, in last, ahaha. They will be taking transit because she thinks a cab will take too long. Everyone else is cabbing. Hmm. Also, Nate & Jenn are fighting. In case you were wondering. The locals are staring, and I don't blame them.

Ron & Christina check in, first again. For the first time so far, when Christina tells her dad she loves him, he replies likewise. Aw, progress. They win a trip to Curacao.

Nic & Gramps and TK & Rachel are all doing the stones at the same time. TK says the faster you go, the less it hurts, so he's pretty much running the course. He and Rachel finish first, with Nic & Gramps right behind. This is looking promising for people who hate assholes everywhere. Oh, but here are Nate & Jenn, walking the jagged rocks, seemingly not very far behind the others, who are having taxicab issues.

Everyone's in cabs. Everyone's stressed out. Even TK & Rachel, relatively speaking. Nonetheless,they arrive at the Pit Stop in second! BOO-YAH. I am so excited, I pulled out a dusty "boo-yah." And you better believe I mean it.

And, in third, in a GIANT TWIST OF FATE THAT NEVER, EVER HAPPENS, it's Nic & Gramps!!!!! WOW. Three teams in the final I don't hate. Well, 2.5, anyhow, which is the most impressive ratio to date. I hardly know what to do with myself.

In fourth and last, Nate & Jenn are eliminated. On her birthday. That's kind ofharsh, but it's not like they don't deserve it. Now please break up and spare the world your offspring, k?

In the preview for next week, I see pieces of Alaska and I reminisce about Season One with bliss. You know, I have to say, I'm completely happy with any of these teams winning. Next week suddenly seems so muchless daunting.

Tags: The Amazing Race

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Original Comments Posted (3)

Antalya says...

That was one of the best episodes of Amazing Race EVER. I thought the editors were setting us up with all the Jen/Nate complaints about how they never finished first blah blah blah and then they would end up winning the whole thing. But then it was her birthday and instead of making the final three, they got the BOOT. And he was crying...CRYING. Every time Jen was telling him how much she hated him, I would say to myself, you know, self, I bet they're still together. AND THEY ARE. Oh, fighty TAR couples, how very predictable you are.

Jan 15, 2008 6:22pm

Ariana says...

They're still together? Like, in real life, for sure for sure? Bleh.

Man, what the hell. I gotta edit this entry. This computer is majorly messed up and the whole thing looks wonky.

Jan 16, 2008 2:30am

Antalya says...

I did not watch the post-bootage interview, but I heard they are together and thinking about reproducing, which is just wonderful.

Jan 16, 2008 7:56pm

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